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The Ubiquitous Jesus: He’s EVERYWHERE

Published on: April 16, 2009 – 11:12 am by Jillian Madison Comment

These days, Jesus is truly… everywhere:

He’s spying on you while you’re soaking in the tub

He’s pwning n00bs

funny jesus sighting

He’s protecting your wound from the elements

funny jesus sighting

He’s mocking your inability to parallel park

He’s a delightful alternative to clear packing tape

funny jesus sighting

He’s a place to store your valuables while walking through abandoned cities after Armageddon

funny jesus sighting

He’s holding your spare coinage

funny jesus sighting

He’s, uh, “bringing people together”

funny jesus sighting

He’s a friendly, whimsical spot to hang your outerwear

funny jesus sighting

He’s crushing your ass in this giant truck

funny jesus sighting

He’s chillin’ with Elvis

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He’s tenderly coaching little Jimmy

funny jesus sighting

He’s a chocolaty edible

funny jesus sighting

He’s keeping your lips protected from deadly rays

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He’s a reminder not to run – on the ice – in 4″ heels

funny jesus sighting

He’s convincing his co-workers he’s psychic

funny jesus sighting

He’s freelancing for Pfizer

funny jesus sighting

THERE HE IS AGAIN! ON YOUR NEIGHBOR’S DOG’S ASS!

funny jesus sighting

He’s a reminder not to get drunk and go to tattoo parlors

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He’s a HOT AIR BALLOON.

funny jesus sighting

And finally, he’s a gay-friendly, rainbow loving, donkey riding balloon sculpture.

funny jesus sighting

See? Jesus truly is EVERYWHERE.

Other posts on Pophangover:

  1. Fresh Prince Of The Air [Balloon Boy Rap]
  2. WWJD: What WOULDN’T Jesus Do?
  3. Worst Commercial Of All Time
  4. If Oprah’s On Twitter, Can Our Grandmothers Be Close Behind?
  5. Jimmy Fallon’s “Lick It For Ten” vs. Our “Lick It For Twenty”





  1. Natalie
    April 16th, 2009

    What is that? A board meeting with Jesus?!

  2. Natalie
    April 16th, 2009

    Btw I wonder if he’s having milk and sugar with his coffee…or tea

  3. pwkwsfi
    April 17th, 2009

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