The 8 Ugliest Painted Jean Jackets Ever
Published on: September 10, 2009 – 11:41 am by Jillian Madison 
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I’ve always hated AIRBRUSHED DENIM JACKETS. They’re tacky, they’re trashy, and they’re always hideous. Here’s eight of the ugliest denim creations I’ve ever seen in my life:
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DESCRIPTION: It’s an airbrushed cowboy jumping over a misplaced, swooping line of fringe. HOW CHARMING. . HOW I WANT TO SEE IT DIE: Cut up into 1,000 tiny pieces, and then thrown from the top of a ferris wheel at Dollywood while “The Dance” by Garth Brooks played in the background. |
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DESCRIPTION: A portrait of some random person from a million centuries ago. Gender: unknown. . HOW I WANT TO SEE IT DIE: Burned to death in a kiln, next to all the shitty pottery bowls your art teacher made you create when you were in 4th grade. |
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DESCRIPTION: Not totally sure, but I think it’s the Virgin Mary being swallowed by a giant floral vagina. . HOW I WANT TO SEE IT DIE: Strapped to the side of the space shuttle, where all that day-glo paint would create a miraculous display on the way up. |
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DESCRIPTION: I have no idea, so let’s just call it THE UGLIEST FUCKING THING EVER. .. HOW I WANT TO SEE IT DIE: Repeatedly run over by a freshly sharpened zamboni. |
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DESCRIPTION: A singing doll dressed up like Stephanie Zinone during the Loni Kaye Lani luau in Grease 2. . HOW I WANT TO SEE IT DIE: Forced to listen to John Tesh records until it spontaneously combusts. |
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DESCRIPTION: A butterfly moments before it dive-bombs your head at a picnic. . HOW I WANT TO SEE IT DIE: In a deep landfill, buried under piles of Jamie Lee’s empty Activia containers and Guy Fieri’s discarded hate mail. |
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DESCRIPTION: A bulldog with a smoking/drooling problem, pictured above a completely unreadable word.Wait, does that say PRUDE?. . HOW I WANT TO SEE IT DIE: Sucked up into a tornado, never to be heard from again. Buh-bye. |
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DESCRIPTION: Duh! It’s Bridge Man… which is just code for “tacky jacket.” . HOW I WANT TO SEE IT DIE: Pockets loaded up with rocks, flung off the top of the Golden Gate. Fitting, no? |
Other posts on Pophangover:
September 10th, 2009
That ‘floral vagina’ is part of the ‘Our Lady of Guadalupe’ depiction. I have no idea what the hell is going on with the technicolor disaster behind it though.
September 10th, 2009
The butterfly one would be cute for a little girl.
But the rest…who wears that shit?
September 11th, 2009
those are horrific
September 11th, 2009
the 80s are coming back in but these are just bad
September 14th, 2009
i want one
October 19th, 2009
the goalie one is patrick roy. he used to do this minute-long twitchfest before every game, kinda looked like both sides of his face were competing in a stroke-off.
perhaps the owner of that rag of a jacket wanted to immortalize the goaltender mid-twitch?
November 25th, 2009
lmfao, you don’t sharpen the zamboni. fail.