STARTING NOW: New Rules for 10/23/08
Published on: October 23, 2008 – 11:38 am by Jillian Madison 
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Starting Now: New Rules
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STARTING NOW: Minute Rice needs to change its name to something more honest… like “THIS SHIT NEVER COOKS” rice. I tried to cook some last night, but after 60 minutes, it was still harder than Ron Jeremy. Something’s gotta give. If I wanted to stand around for 3 hours waiting to eat dinner, I’d go to Olive Garden. |
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STARTING NOW: Men are no longer allowed to make their cars sound so damn loud. I was startled awake the other day by a modded car that was louder than the baggage claim at LAX. Besides, you’re not saying “look at me!” You’re saying “my penis is too small to satisfy a Cheerio.” |
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STARTING NOW: Lazy kids aren’t allowed to get any candy for Halloween. Sorry, but a white sheet with holes cut out of it isn’t a costume. It’s an operating room prop on Grey’s Anatomy. |
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STARTING NOW: Get Paris Hilton off my television. I don’t want to see her on MTV, pretending to search for a new best friend. Can’t somebody just slip her Kurt Loder’s number so we can all be done with it? |
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Other posts on Pophangover:
October 23rd, 2008
Amen to the loud cars, sister! My neighbor has one of those modified engines that stick up through the roof and it is so incredibly annoying and unnecessary.
October 23rd, 2008
Minute Rice! I was *JUST* bitching to my husband about the same thing. How funny! It takes me 45 minutes to cook 2 servings. Hardly “one minute.”
October 23rd, 2008
To bust your theory wide open, my car is loud and my penis is 20 inches long when flaccid.
October 23rd, 2008
ebony-and-irony, 20 inches… uh, you might want to go have that looked at by a doctor, bro
love these new rules. keep em up